Valentine’s Day Isn’t Just for Couples

By Rose Degenhardt, MA, RCT, CCC

Registered Counselling Therapist | Founder & Clinical Director, Venture Counselling & Therapy Inc.

Posted: February 12, 2026

When a Holiday Brings Mixed Feelings

Valentine’s Day is often marketed as a celebration of couples. Restaurants fill with candlelight, social media fills with roses and grand gestures, and love is presented as something that must be publicly paired to be valid.

For many people, that narrative fits. For many others, it doesn’t.

In psychotherapy, we talk a lot about how holidays can intensify emotions. Valentine’s Day in

particular has a way of amplifying feelings of loneliness, grief, comparison, or

longing—especially for those who are single, recently separated, divorced, or navigating a

season of life that looks very different from what they once imagined.

If Valentine’s Day feels complicated for you, there is nothing wrong with that.

Remembering the Years of Being Alone

I remember the years after my marriage ended. After being married for 13 years, Valentine’s

Day felt especially tender. It wasn’t just about being single—it was about grieving a future I

thought I would have, and learning how to sit with that loss while the world seemed to celebrate romantic love so loudly.

There were moments when I felt strong and independent, and others when I felt deeply lonely. Both were true. Healing didn’t move in a straight line. Some Valentine’s Days passed quietly. Some were harder than I expected.

Those years taught me an important truth: being single is not a failure. And being alone is not

the same as being unlovable. But loneliness is still a real human experience—and it deserves

compassion, not judgment.

Parenting Seasons Change, Too

This Valentine’s Day feels different for me in another way as well.

My children are grown now. No one is asking me to run out and buy Valentine’s cards or bake

cookies for their classmates. No late nights decorating treat bags or trying to remember how

many kids are in each class.

Recently, I found myself walking through the dollar store, surrounded by pink hearts, tiny cards, and cute Valentine’s treats. And I felt two things at once.

I grieved the season when my kids were little. The excitement. The chaos. The sweetness of

helping them prepare something special for their friends.

And at the same time, I felt genuine relief.

Because while I loved those years, I do not miss staying up until midnight baking dozens of

cookies or crafting elaborate classroom treats.

Both emotions were real. Grief and gratitude. Nostalgia and acceptance. That’s how life

unfolds—not in neat chapters, but overlapping ones.

How Psychotherapy Can Support This Season

In therapy, Valentine’s Day often brings themes of attachment, self-worth, comparison, and loss

to the surface. Clients may notice increased anxiety, sadness, or a sense of “being behind.”

Psychotherapy offers space to:

• Normalize mixed emotions instead of minimizing them

• Explore relationship patterns without shame

• Redefine love beyond romantic partnerships

• Build self-compassion during emotionally charged seasons

• Learn how to tolerate longing without letting it define your worth

Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be something to “survive.” It can be an opportunity to pause,

reflect, and gently reconnect with yourself.

Reclaiming Valentine’s Day When You’re Single

If you’re single this Valentine’s Day, you are not excluded—you are simply in a different chapter.

And that chapter still deserves care and intention.

Some nourishing ways to reclaim the day include:

• Treating yourself to a favourite meal or dessert

• Booking a massage, facial, or spa visit

• Planning a cozy movie night with friends or solo

• Buying yourself flowers or a small gift, just because

• Writing yourself a letter acknowledging your growth and resilience

• Hosting a “Galentine’s” or “Friendentine’s” evening

Love doesn’t need a witness to be real. It just needs to be felt.

Valentine’s Week Ideas in Nova Scotia

If you’re local and looking for something grounding or joyful to do, Nova Scotia offers many

ways to connect—without pressure:

• A winter walk along the Halifax Waterfront or a local trail

• Sitting in a cozy café with a book or journal

• Exploring local shops or artisan markets

• Attending live music, trivia, or community events

• Spending quiet time near the ocean—there’s something deeply regulating about winter

waves.

Connection doesn’t always come from people. Sometimes it comes from place, presence, and slowing down.

Redefining Love

Valentine’s Day can celebrate romantic love—but it can also honour love in all its forms: self-

love, friendship, family, memory, healing, and growth.

Love changes shape throughout our lives. What mattered once may soften. What we didn’t

expect may arrive later. None of it is wasted.

Each season teaches us something about ourselves.

Final Thoughts

If Valentine’s Day feels heavy this year, please be gentle with yourself. You are not behind. You

are not missing out. You are not doing life wrong.

You are simply in a season that deserves care.

And that season matters.

Sign-Off

With compassion for every season of love, loss, and becoming,

Rose Degenhardt, MA, RCT, CCC

Registered Counselling Therapist

Founder & Clinical Director, Venture Counselling & Therapy Inc.

A Reflection for You

What would it look like to honour yourself this Valentine’s Day—exactly as you are, in the

season you’re in?